Chapter 146 Rupture

"You are really not a good person, you are selfish and self-serving, just treating us as your ladder. Use us when you need us, and kick us away when you don't. Not just me, but also Yuzan, Lianqiao, Second Miss, they are all just tools for you, right?"
这话一出口，不要说是京墨了，就连忍冬自己，都有些愣神。
有的话可以随便说出口，有的玩笑可以随便开。可忍冬刚才的话，不像是玩笑，更像是借着这场怒火，发泄出自己最真实的想法。
Jingmo stood still, unable to distinguish between day and night for a while, as if floating in a realm of nothingness.
After a while, she finally came back to her senses. Wuendong was long gone, leaving the room empty with only her left.
Unconsciously, I took two steps back, and Jing Mo fell to the ground.
The words of Rendong were like a sharp sword, piercing Jing Mo's heart, making her chest hurt so much that she could hardly breathe.
Tools?
Why does sincere dedication become a tool in the eyes of winter?
She covered her heart with her hand and took a while to catch her breath.
Someone outside was calling her name, and she quickly answered. But the voice of that response sounded particularly unfamiliar, as if it were someone else's voice.
是哪个只会利用的、把朋友都当作是工具人的人的声音吗？
京墨不知道答案，也不想知道答案。她强撑着站起来，装作若无其事的模样，做完了一系列的事情。
只是这仿佛并不是她本人在做一样，更像是身体里的另一部分控制着自己。
或许，那另一部分应该就是那个自私自利的人吧？
Even Yuzan and Doukou didn't notice anything wrong with her, so in fact, it was Winter Jasmine who was right, the selfish and self-centered person is herself, right?
Mentally absent-minded, not knowing what she was thinking, but acting as usual. The original water had been drunk up, and Doukou urged Jingmo to go and change the kettle for hot water to brew tea for Lady Bai.
Jing Mo silently accepted the command and went out, causing Lady Bai to glance sideways.
"What's wrong with her?"
"What's wrong?"
Doukou was removing the dishes from the table. Lady Bai had just finished breakfast, she looked around and hardly ate anything, so she remembered it and prepared to ask the kitchen to send some snacks over later.
While calculating in his mind, he was suddenly interrupted by Mrs. Bai's soft question, which caught him off guard, and he didn't realize it at first.
\"Look at the state of Jing Mo. It seems like she's holding back something.\"\n\nNote: The original Chinese text provided contains web tags that are not directly translatable into English. The translation focuses on the content of the text while keeping the web tags in Chinese.
"What is she hiding... Could it be...?"
Everything seemed fine before, but suddenly, a thought crossed her mind, and Doukou also hesitated.
"I also think it might be something to do with Tan'er. He's the kind of person who never tells us anything in advance."
Madam Bai rubbed her forehead, feeling helpless when it comes to Bai Tan.
"Forget it, their business is none of my concern."
As soon as she finished speaking, Jingmo made some hot water, returned with a tea tray.
The timing was just right. For a moment, Mrs. Bai didn't know if she had heard what she said. But seeing Jingmo looking so dazed, she pretended as if she hadn't heard anything.
等京墨退了出去，豆蔻还有点奇怪：“我倒是觉得她没什么事，看着也还挺正常的，会不会是我们猜错了？”
白夫人摇摇头：“我看别人可能不准，可我看她，倒是一看一个准。她那副模样，就是心里头有事，都想的丢了神了。”
“夫人您看人准，这我见识过，实在是心服口服。可京墨这表现，可不是像是知道了少爷要走的模样啊？”
“那还能有什么事情，能叫她这样子失魂落魄？”
Ji Dou Kong was still somewhat puzzled, and Madam Bai gave a gentle smile: \"Do you remember how she carried the tea tray when she first entered? Her fingers on the tea tray were constantly tapping gently. Normally, she doesn't tap the tea tray. Besides, when she put down the tea cup and pot, she placed the pot first this time. You should know that before, she always placed the tea cup first.\"
Doukou was amazed and couldn't help but praise: "Madam, your observations are truly meticulous. I have never noticed these little habits of Jingmo."
"It's not that I have observed meticulously, it's just that I used to have these little habits too."
白夫人轻叹一声，摇摇头，不愿意再多提。
这一日过的很快，京墨还没反应过来，就已经黑了天了。
白夫人今日睡得早，也不熬夜了，熄了灯就去睡了。
Jingmo returned to the room alone, and after a while, she realized it was already evening. She had spent the whole day in a daze, and only now did she realize that she hadn't seen Reed all day.
这个时辰了，已经不早了，忍冬又能跑去哪里？
她着急起来，正想要起身去寻找，却看见远远一个小小的身影走了过来。不是别人，正是忍冬。
Jing Mo's eyes lit up, about to call her name, but her throat suddenly tightened, preventing her from speaking.
It wasn't until later that she realized that the two had argued earlier that day, and at this moment, Shuang'geng was not on good terms with her.
She awkwardly put down her raised arm, looking like a wilted eggplant, listless.
Winter was approaching gradually, as if it hadn't seen Jingmo at all, and went straight into the house.
Jingmo was taken aback, and quickly turned around, wanting to say something, but suddenly it went dark in front of her, turns out Rendong had turned off the light.
"... Rendong?"
No one answered.
Her voice echoed emptily, spinning in the silence, eventually landing in her heart, gradually turning into a sharp blade, cutting her heart over and over again.
Remembered what Winter Jasmine said during the day.
King Ink still remembers the little friction he had with Winter Jasmine before, clearly he said that they could turn the page and move on, but why can't they do that now?
她急促地呼吸着，仿佛这样就能缓过劲来。
一、二、三......
她小心翼翼地迈步走到床边，准备脱衣服。
“我们以后还是不要当朋友了吧，你不是我能高攀的起的人。”
又是一柄利刃，再一次精准地命中了京墨的心脏。
“你为什么要这么说？我们明明是很好的朋友啊？”
下意识地问出了声，可京墨却知道，这句话必然是得不到回答的。
果然，回答她的是安静的屋子里，渐渐变重的呼吸声。
京墨站了好久，直到腿没了知觉，失去了力气，她才跌跌撞撞地回了床。
This night is particularly long for Jing Mo, who finally falls into a fitful sleep but keeps waking up at the slightest sound.
Fortunately, no matter how much suffering, time is still ruthless, not giving her any face. In this cycle of waking and sleeping, a faint light appeared in the sky.
There was a rustling sound coming through.
Jing Mo woke up immediately, recognizing the sound coming from the direction of Winter Jasmine. Somehow, she didn't dare to move, maintaining a certain posture, even breathing much lighter, afraid of disturbing Winter Jasmine.
脚步声响起，京墨还没反应过来，那脚步声就已经近在耳边了。
脑海之中一瞬间闪过许多的画面，有忍冬抱着自己哭的，有痛下狠手一刀刺死自己的，京墨想的都有些头晕了，都没感受到忍冬接下来的动作。
过了许久，才又有声音响起。
“再见......”
这句道别似乎用尽了忍冬所有的力气，京墨连她的脚步声都听不清楚了，更别说知道她是什么时候离开的。
When he woke up again, the room was already half empty. Jingmo looked around, only his own belongings were left in the room, everything belonging to Lonicera had been moved out. Some things they used together were also left behind, as if representing another owner of it saying goodbye.
京墨慌张起来，连衣服都来不及整理，就冲出了屋子。
门外，玉簪正在指示着小丫鬟扫地。
抬头见她这么一副衣衫不整的样子，玉簪不由得惊讶起来：“你怎么这样子就出来了？”
“玉簪姐姐，你看见忍冬了吗？我一起来，就见屋子里都空了，她也不见了踪影，这是去哪里了啊？”
"Don't you know?"
玉簪微微一愣。
"I thought she had told you."
"Told...told me what?"
"Yesterday, Rendong begged Madam, saying that due to her father's sake, she felt she was no longer qualified to serve in the Weiru Courtyard. She begged Madam to ask her to go to an empty small courtyard to do rough work as a cleaning maid." Yuzan hesitated for a moment, not knowing why Rendong did not tell Jingmo, but still said what she knew, "She moved her things there yesterday, but the maids in that courtyard didn't have time to clean up the room, so it was dragged overnight."
"She...she didn't say a word to me. I didn't know about this..."
Jingmo lost his spirits, and his head drooped heavily.
Now, even Yuzan didn't know what to say.
她犹豫着，轻声问道：“我听说你们昨天吵架了？这事又是怎么一回事？”
“没事，不过是我太心狠了，叫她伤了心了。”
Without explaining in detail, Yuzan already understood the reason and couldn't help but feel a headache.
It is estimated that Lady Bai's game will take some time to play out, but Jing Mo and Rendong have already formed a grudge. If this issue is not resolved, the grudge will continue to exist, and their relationship will become more and more estranged with each passing day.
"Do you... do you want me to go find her and talk to her?"
Yuzan finally couldn't bear it and was preparing to go find Rendong to tell her the truth of the matter.
"No need, it's already like this, it won't make much difference for now. When things are resolved, I will personally explain it to her."
Jing Mo reluctantly smiled and stopped Yu Zan.